Summer + Water = FUN!

When I think of Summer, I see heat rising from the pavement and perspiration dripping down foreheads. The Lovin' Spoonful's, "Hot town, summer in the city, back of my neck feeling dirt and gritty," rings in my ears. I also smell suntan lotion, feel the sun warm on my face, and hear waves crashing against the beach. 

And then my fantasy ends and I'm sitting in a home nowhere near the ocean or even a beach. 

Because my kids (when they were younger) and I seldom got a chance to visit a beach, pools were always the next best thing for us. But going back even further to my own childhood, I remember family vacations when we drove to various states around the country and spent nights together in a motel. The only prerequisite, no matter where we slept, was that our motel had to have a pool. 

We would arrive at the motel, slide into our swim suits, and race for the pool. Swimsuits on, Cindy and I would jump into the pool while Kathy sat with her feet dangling over the edge (Kathy was afraid of the water). For some reason, we were usually the only family in those pools, and we still reminisce about the luxury of having those pools all to ourselves so many times.

When my own kids were younger, I had been hunting for a home that would accommodate all of us. One in particular seemed to have my name written all over it. The entire back yard was a built-in swimming pool – what fun! – with no grass to mow! But the rooms inside the home were microscopically small and had a lot of problems, so I didn't buy it.

My own pool purchases throughout the years, including my daycare years, consisted of tiny wading pools (for me), but big enough so the kids could splash around. If I could have, I would have had a large pool for myself (I mean, the kids) – one that was clean – chlorine clean. And that's another smell that reminds me of summer – chlorine. 

What makes summer tolerable for people who don't particularly care to sweat all day (like me) is water – lake water, ocean water, or pool water. Now I'm daydreaming about having my own pool. I just checked out some beautiful in-ground liners at Doheny and discovered some really inexpensive chlorine tabs. All I have to do now is purchase a pool!

Don't Know

I appreciate the guest post, Jamie Guy I sure don’t know much about technology but that’s okay. I have a lot of good people around me who know what’s going on but for me it’s more about making sure the day to day business in the store flows smoothly and not that I’ve got all the best technology knowledge, you know? I don’t need to know all the specifics of t1 internetor how to build a website because I have IT consultants who can do that kind of stuff for me. Otherwise I’d have to be an expert in every little thing and that just won’t work when you’re running a company of one. I thought about it for a long time before I decided to take on this whole small business thing and I feel good about where I’m at. I wish I had more help and that things didn’t cost so much but you know, at the end of the day I’m really proud of how far I’ve come and what this business is starting to look like.

Child's Creativity and Nate's Influence Can Enhance Your Home

Did you ever come across something that has been around for a while, but since you just discovered it, you feel as if you've just invented the cure for cancer? That's how I feel about Nate. Yes, Nate – Nate Berkus.

Though I've never met the man, in my imagination we are friends. Nate is creative, funny, cute, and inspiring. He is also too young for me and he is gay, so my chances of dating him are zero. 

However, I spend more time with Nate than I do with any other man. Yep! One hour a day in Nateland, learning and discovering, imagining and creating. Nate is the ONLY man on the planet who can get me to shop, though I must confess to preferring online shopping to actual shopping (contrary to popular belief, some women really do hate to shop). 

Nate sparks my creativity and once my imagination becomes ignited, my mind explodes with ideas. I start experimenting. My convertible handbag backpack houses all of my finds, whether they come from quaint thrift stores or online specialty shops. As I sift through the contents and wander the aisles (yes, even online), my eyes widen with anticipation.

Maybe a theme would work. How about copper?

OOH! look at that copper top kitchen table. You wouldn't want to cover up that with a table cloth, would you? And maybe some copper kitchen accessories! They would enhance the look of the table and bring out its coppery finish. I could even twist some copper wiring in such a way as to make an attractive wall hanging.

Or how about that copper top table with branch legs? Oh oh – what about the rest of the room – or the rest of the house for that matter? I know. I'll ask the kids. All we need is one original and innovative idea to jumpstart everybody's imagination. I could have one of the kids create a sculpture out of pennies.

Or we could spray paint copper leaves on a canvas, remove the leaves, and unveil a beautiful piece of art (thank you to my daughter, Lindsey, for that idea). 

Every project inspires you to become even more creative. And what's nice about creativity is that children seem to have an abundance of it. Their ideas can motivate and encourage you to change the look and feel of your home, using your children as guides. 

Take them shopping with you (for me that means sitting them in front of my laptop). Ask them for their opinions. Find out what colors they would like you to choose for your kitchen, your bathroom, their bedroom.

Your house is not only your home, it is their home. Who knows? They might come up with ideas you might never have considered.

Encourage Dream Sharing

Previously accidentally posted in All Craft Connection.

Children, like adults, dream every night, but unless you ask them to share their dreams, they, like adults again, are unlikely to remember them. By asking your children about their dreams, you are glimpsing a part of their lives that is filled with symbols, feelings, and attitudes.

Often, children will interpret their own dreams, as my youngest daughter did on occasion. In 3-Year-Old Interprets Her Own Dream, Brittney wasn't aware that she was interpreting her dream, but I was. 

When you encourage your children to share their dreams, you are discovering aspects of your children that you might not have known. You might be surprised, when you ask them about the monster in their dreams, to discover that the monster looked like you! And when you review the previous day, you might remember losing your sanity at one point and, as you review the situation, you will understand how you might have appeared to be a monster to your child.

When your child relates his or her dream, ask questions and ask for descriptions: 

What did the monster look like? 

Describe the house you were visiting. 

Does any element (person, place, or thing) remind you of anybody or anything. 

How did you feel during the dream? 

Emotions felt during a dream will give you further clues about how your child feels in waking life. 

Why would you want to encourage your child to share his or her dreams? Let's say your child dreamed about a snake that was continually striking your child. Upon questioning, you learn that the snake looks like your child's daycare provider. Now you can take action.

When children share their dreams, they share their emotions, their feelings, and their thoughts. By investigating their dreams, you can learn about things that matter to your child, that frighten your child, and that bring him or her joy. All you have to do each morning is ask, "What did you dream about last night?" and you will enter your child's world in a way you've never dreamed ;)

Want to read more from this author? Click on any of the blogs that appear in the upper right-hand side of this blog under the Donate button.

My neighbor's alarm went off in the middle of the night

Guest post from: Natalie Walter There is really nothing more alarming than being suddenly jarred awake in the middle of the night by a screeching siren outside your house. I was talking to my neighbor recently and she was telling me about the ADT Security packages that she was looking into but I didn’t know that they had recently gotten a system installed on their home. Evidently their son who was away at college was unaware of that fact as well. He had a hard weekat school and decided to drive home in the middle of the night and let himself in the house as usual only this time he set off the alarm and woke up half the neighborhood in the process. I found out the next morning that he scared his parents half to death because they thought he was an intruder. I think it scared him half to death too because he was trying to sneak in all quietly to keep from waking up the dog and his parents and instead he woke up them and everyone within a ten mile radius of the house.

Collection Harassment and the Single Parent

During that period of time when I was raising my three youngest children alone, going to school full time, and working three part time jobs, I still couldn't afford to pay my bills. Every month I played the "what bill shall I pay this month?" game. And what that meant was taking a look at my checkbook, finding out who got paid most recently, and then paying the one(s) who hadn't recently received payment. More than a few creditors lost out on getting paid each month.

Calling my creditors to get some relief in lowering my payments helped in some cases, but most creditors were not so understanding. I frequently received harassing phone calls, and it got to the point that I was afraid to answer my phone. They were relentless. "When do you think you'll be able to make a payment?" Never.

What I wanted to say was, "Well, you are number 34, so maybe next month." While that was the truth, I actually said something like, "I'm really sorry. When my refrigerator broke, I had to get a new one and when my car broke down three times, because the dealership sold me a lemon, I had to pay for repairs. When my furnace broke, I had to get a new one of those too, and I just don't make that much money." 

With everything breaking (cars numerous times), I felt as if I had a bad luck cloud following me wherever I went, and creditors were steering it. Keeping up with the bills was impossible, and for some reason, I couldn't get my kids to stop growing. My expenses outweighed my income by about $500 a month. By the time I divided my income into easily payable amounts, some creditors received only about $10 a month. I apologized – again and again. But it was all I could afford to pay. I really tried to pay for everything, but the harassing phone calls continued – until I claimed bankruptcy, and believe me, I was not happy about claiming bankruptcy.

Over the years, one car after another broke down. The problems were never simple fixes – they were engines and transmissions. One time one of the cars literally blew up. Fortunately nobody was in it at the time.

That was in the 1980s and 1990s. Recently I had to get my roof fixed. The vent caps were leaking and it was causing mold to form on my ceiling. It was not something I could afford, but I could also not afford to let it go, because I'm highly allergic to mold. 

When I asked the contractors if they could work out a deal with me, because I had a limited income, they said yes. I should have been more specific. They had no idea I could afford so little, but by the time we worked it out, the ceiling and roof were already fixed. Fortunately, though I'm sending them only $25 a month until the $1,000 deductible is paid, they are not complaining. 

However, the State of Illinois IS complaining. When I got cancer in 2009, I was providing daycare and making very little money. I also provided daycare in 2008 and made even less. However, I somehow managed to rack up a $1,000 bill (half of which was attorney fees) to the state of Illinois and they want their money – NOW – for 2008 and 2009. 

I know why. The financial state of Illinois is dismal and Illinois is desperate. They won't go after the big corporations. They come after the little people who make nearly nothing – people like me. That's the kind of sense Illinois makes. But actually, the State of Illinois isn't coming after me anymore. When I forgot to make one payment during those months when chemo wiped me out, without notice, I was turned over to collections. 

Without notice, an attorney for the State of Illinois suddenly started forcing me to pay more than I could afford to pay. Though I pay the state (through this attorney who doubled what I owed the state) $10 a month – consistently – and though I can't afford $10 a month, I pay them $10 a month anyway – consistently. I want to scream, "STOP HARASSING ME!"  But it's pointless to argue or to complain. I honestly cannot pay more than $10 a month. Sorry, Illinois, that's all you're getting. End of story.

I continue to pay all of my bills, despite the fact that things break on me all the time still. Yesterday, for instance, as I was filling my daughter's air mattress (my daughter and two of her sons moved in with me), the electric pump broke. After the pump broke, two portable closets broke, and in the midst of trying to get the horrid things together, before we realized they were worthless, my washing machine broke. For several months to come, we will be washing clothes by hand and using my battery operated pump to fill the air mattresses. Without enough closets to hang things, clothes will have to remain folded on the floor.

Despite my piling bills, those creditors WILL be paid. Maybe not quickly, maybe not in amounts creditors want me to pay, but I AM paying my bills. I am also still getting harassed by the attorney who was hired by the State of Illinois to harass me. Even though he knew my financial circumstances when he contacted me, because I shared with him my income and my expenses, even though he initially accepted $10 a month, he now wants me to pay hundreds of dollars more. 

I know that people everywhere are suffering from these kinds of calls. Stop collection harassment California! Stop collection harassment Maine! Stop collection harassment Illinois! STOP collection harassment everywhere! Like so many people who have to deal with harassing phone calls, I just want to stop collection harassment for good. I know what I should do, because I've learned that the only way to stop creditors from making harassing phone calls is to get an attorney; however it appears I will have to stay away from those who also work in collections.

NY Grandparents

Guest post written by my buddy Aldo Mays My grandparents are originally from New York, New York. About seven years ago, they bought a condo in a retirement home in – you guessed it—Southern Florida. Like many of their friends, they move to the condo in November. My grandfather always jokes and says that it is to save money on natural gas prices new york. It’s true, in Southern Florida in the winter, you do not have to run the heat or an air conditioner. The weather is about seventy five degrees all years. My grandparents absolutely love being Floridians during the winter. It’s funny though, everyone in their condo association is of the same demographic. They are Jewish New Yorkers—imagine that! I tease them all they time and say they got their idea from the Seinfeld episode. Spending winter break in Florida was an adjustment, but I love it. I look forward to hearing seagulls, seeing the ocean, and playing shuffleboardwith my grandparents and their friends. Shuffleboard is definitely more fun than it looks!