Transitions For Children Who Travel Between Two Homes

Divorce is difficult enough for parents, but when you factor in children, you find that the problems can sometimes be insurmountable. When parents live far apart from each other, children give up friends and leisure time to spend time with the "other" parent. Unless children have friends at both homes, they are pretty much restricted to spending their entire time with the other parent.

Some kids may feel resentful about having to shuffle back and forth and some parents, concerned about the upheaval, will leave the children at one home while the parents transition back and forth.

Most parents can't afford to keep three residences though, and most parents aren't willing to share one apartment, so children are the ones who have to move back and forth between residences.

Depending upon what happens at the "other" parent's home, the transition period between homes can be smooth or rough.

David A. Reinstein, LCSW offers help for parents who share custody of their children. His article, Helping Your Child Transition Back from Time with the "Other" Parent, is worth reading if you want to help your child with this emotional transition. Click the link to read it.

Single by Divorce?

We are single parents for a variety of reasons. Maybe we were never married. Maybe our spouse died. Maybe we made the choice to be single. Or maybe we're divorced.

As we know, the consequences of divorce affect not only us, but also, and sometimes especially, our children. We know first-hand the pain and the anguish divorce causes US, but, because we are so focused on our own grief, we sometimes neglect to pay attention to the devastating effects divorce has on OUR CHILDREN.

Maybe your husband drank too much. Maybe your wife was a crack addict. But no matter what the problem was that led to your divorce, whether it was gambling, affairs, whatever, YOUR CHILDREN BLAME THEMSELVES for the divorce and everything related to the divorce. Your children look upon the dissolution of your marriage as THEIR responsibility. And they blame themselves COMPLETELY.

While we focus on ourselves and our problems, our children have nowhere to go but inside themselves where the blame becomes compounded and the sadness absorbs into every fiber of their being. With one parent gone, the health and safety of our children sits precariously in our hands. Are we capable of handling the problems that arise as a result of our decision to divorce their father or mother?

Fortunately help comes in a variety of forms, and as I discover more help for single parents, I will post what I find here. Today I would like to link you to a new DIVORCE BLOG. Click the link, read the posts, leave comments, and heal yourself and your children.